Possible end of chapter, beginning of next...

Here are some pics of a hot rod I saw yesterday that stopped my heart!

That truck is SOOOOO Hot! holy shit.

Later last night I ended up going for a beer with a buddy from school, and we was telling me that he found a

place for his family in town here. For 1100 a month and its got four bedrooms and a GARAGE... He was wondering if Id be interested in renting one of the rooms with him to help his costs. Well. One thing Im not getting out in the bush, is a chance to work on my projects, mainly my bike. When I saw that hot rod it reminded me how much I wanted to get my project done, and how I dont have any ability to work on it. If I can get some space in that garage to work on my bike, im pretty much sold.

My Bike, (Still a long ways from finished)

Where It Started.

I also talked with my mom yesterday, as well as some advice from a few people, who generally suggested that buying right now isn't the best option. For reasons of the market, where Im at, and etc.etc.

Im also not hitting the gym cause I dont want to get sweaty, as finding a shower for me isnt as easy as it used to be.

Im not getting a chance to work on my bike (Finish it and start another Rat rod project), which that Model T Ford got me thinking about. Im driving alot, and not really having as much fun as id like to.

I live right by a rock-climbing area, but dont climb at all cause its where I live and I dont have the energy for it.

I want to SKI!!!! And I stay in the bush, that can't happen either. (No way Im getting cold and wet skiing then driving up to my shack in the middle of winter).

Not me, But I want it to be.

So, all in all, Maybe its best to hunker down in a apartment this winter, as it sounds like it would take a extreme amount of effort to make it happen in the bush anyways, and there are other things in life that im interested in.

Ive been out there for 2.5 months now, and wouldnt move into that place until beginning of December, so thats close to four months,

I feel thats a pretty good stint of roughing it.

And I can use that shack to get away in for the winter if I get squirely in the house. It would mean I have to get up there quite a bit to look after it, but that shouldn't be a problem

So maybe that chapter of this school adventure might end. Another begin.

Gonna go smoke some cigars

Now that im fed and well posted,

Im going to go up the mountain and light up a fire, and smoke a couple cigars.

OOPS, I double posted,

Oh well, both poems are good haha,

I re-wrote it cause I thought that I didnt post the last one..

Computers..

A sonnet to my truck. And some pics of my site.

 A sonnet to my truck.

Oh truck,

How you never fail,

How even when I break you,

You are always fixable,

I love how you sound when your cold,

and you scare old ladies on the street with your

loud exhaust sounds,

How you squeak and groan, 

But you eventually get there.

I love your rust.

Those great holes of rust that are getting bigger,

I love that your front shocks are blown.

I love that the back shocks are good.

I love that often I need to kick my bumper back into shape,

with steel toe boots.

I love my truck.

Here are some pics of what my shack as it is right now, as well as some of the wood that Ive gathered.

My truck was a huge help with that fire wood as I used it to cross some pretty gnarly terrain, totally natural terrain, with full loads of that fire wood, as close as I could to my site. It still took a fair amount of sweat to get those rounds of wood to the site, but it helped tonnes!

Ive got a tarp over the wood now, as it was snowing later that night that that picture was taken. I hope to set up a little roof over the wood so that I can gather more and have easy access to it.

That log there is a beast and Im trying to figure out something that I can use it for that would be worth the effort of hauling it to site. I dont have a chain saw to hack it up. All those rounds that I have Ive scrounged from abandoned campsites and the logging road itself. People lose them from there truck and leave them there.

I also have a friend from school trying to hook me up with some roof building materials, hopefully that pans out.

The Wolf

On the way to work on Sunday morning, I was attacked.

Nothing could have seemed more unlikely, but like as not, it happened.

So it was a 4am start at the bakery as usual, means that I set the alarm in the hut for about 3am, crawl out of the warm tomb of my blankets and sleeping bags and quickly throw on my boots and run through the bush to get to my truck, as the cold cuts through you and follows you like a predator.

I got in my truck, and to be honest, I had enough sleep that night.

I was driving down the logging road and chilling out with the thoughts of books and such in my head. One particular book lead to the particular scene of a wolf biting off the fingers of a grown man, than…

BOOM!!!

I was attacked.

I am not joking with you.

A wolf jumped out and attacked me.

My heart skipped a beat and the shot of adranaline that hit me was enough to kill a small horse. The old instincts of fight or flight kicked in, and I knew what my body was deciding, than…

like all silly scares, I realized the next instant, it was the white bum of a deer that had, fast as lightning, jumped away from me, around the corner of a hill.

HAHAHAHAAHAHAHA. Oh my god, I thought I was a goner right there and then.

I was shaking the fear was so sharp.

Oh well, a deer looks a lot like a wolf right??

Also a thought of moving into that little lot that guy marcel has, doesn’t actually get me that excited and I think I might still stick it out, out here until I get really destroyed. Or at least that is this 5 minutes of thought telling me.

A rant.

Ive always done things independently, and ever since I could ride a bike I would ride around for hours. Not really going anywhere particular, just exploring and trying to create missions.

I remember very vividly sitting at my living room window, staring out at the street to wait for my friend (only friend) Nathan. He was a little older than me, and a possible escape to the never ending boredom that I was always under.

I remember that I wasn’t really even satisfied when he was around. But still a better option than boredom. I wasn’t near old enough to understand my feelings. Only to feel them.

But now that I am older, the main enemy in my life is boredom. That is the killer. That is why I try to break my comfortable ways. Why I sometimes go to relative extremes to do so.

Im not a thrill seeker really, and am not addicted to fear or adrenaline, even though I enjoy a good thrill and a good adrenaline rush. What I am afraid of though. And what is with me often, is sitting somewhere, bored. Not interested, not productive, not feeling good or bad, just bored. That is my fear. And like all fears, it can find a way to manifest itself from the very fear of it itself.

I wonder if I am a loner.

Im not really worried either way. Just that I seem to be quite comfortable with large periods of being alone, not social. Compared to other people? I don’t know about that.

I am alone a lot, and it can be uncomfortable at certain times. But then again, I am very social and friendly, have amazing friends and a great family support, enjoy peoples company. And yet I am completely alone here. I don’t have any real friends here yet and am just starting to work at building some friendships. But being alone is my reality right now.

I don’t think I mind.

This guy from school, is one year older than me and has a wife and two kids, a mortgage and is moving and has a steady job and etc.etc.etc… Crazy how different our paths are right now, and yet we are both in the same program and I believe we both will make good teachers in our own right.

Change of plans and beer

So beer leads to shacks

or shacks lead to beer

or... There was a crow, there was a raven, and there was Matt. Who came first? The shark gets the rest.

Yes.

This weekend was filled with a fare share of beer as I got a few checks and finally feel on top of the water for a bit and needed to celebrate a little. Nothing too crazy though as I have a new found fear (Or respect), of poverty.

I went out for a classmates birthday, the guy who said he'd talk to his father in law about getting me a wood stove. Well it turns out that the father in law said F*** That.

He said to my buddy that a wood stove isnt going to do me any good if my walls are just canvas and my roof is just tarp. He said that "why doesn't he just stay on my land?"

haha, what?

It turns out this guy has a acre of land with a trailer and a shack on it. Its not being used and he's trying to sell it but it definately wont sell during the winter (So he says). I end up meeting him and me and him go down to the land (with a beer stop on the way, for him not me, i dont drink and drive), and we see the place. Well I gotta say its better than where im staying. Not as nice a area but the building has a ROOF. It has INSULATION. It has a WHOLE IN THE MIDDLE OF THE FLOOR THAT IF I FELL INTO I COULD SERIOUSLY HURT MYSELF. Thats all fine! The whole needs to be covered up way better, it needs a stove installed in it, it needs some SERIOUS cleaning up and the property itself could use some TLC but thats all fine, and with this little building i could make it all winter!!

The guy was crazy enthusiastic to get me in there, and to be honest at first it worried me a tiny bit, but my friend from school is the kind of guy I would trust heavily and he tells me his father-in-law is solid gold, and its stupid to turn down help. I offered to pay a little rent (Before I saw the place haha), but the guy (Marcel is his name) said that is not a problem and I think he just wants to help. The place hasnt been touched for years at a time, and I can tell. Probably helps him a bit to have someone on it getting little things looked after. The trailer on the plot is at first what he suggested but when we went in there, it was done. The roof of it had fallen and everything was almost destroyed inside.
The only problem is there is a large pack of angry wolves that use their surrounding plots of land to grow their stock and things like that. I told him thats fine and me and wolves generally get along fine, as long as they dont go for my achilles tendon and try to eat me.

He also told me there was a cougar in the area looking for young meat. I also told him that was fine...

we'll see how it goes on monday as Im planning to head out there with my bud from school again..

Help Comes In Fours

Yesterday was a interesting day.

I guess all my whining has gotten around and decided to cause some trouble.

Four levels of help came to me and Ill tell you what they are.

First is a Santa Clause sized satchel full of muffins. My muchy rations for at least a week, as well as each guy in my class got a muffin today. They where burnt while I was working. The whole... muffin batch. But to be honest it wasnt really my fault. Well, mostly not my fault.

Second is a co-student ended up giving me a bunch of cash straight up. (I gave half of it back today, but still kept the rest), partly for helping him with some school work and mostly just to help. It took me back a bit, and I didnt want to accept it at first, but he was sincere and Ill get him back.

Third is my grandparents emailed me in a panic wanting to help me. And through a phone call and bunch of talking they are going to help me, wether I wanted to be helped or not, it is best. And now much appreciated, cause taking out loans with a 100% interest makes no sense and is hard to get out of.

Fourth, on my way home I decided (Wisely) to check out a big campsite that had been in use for a week or so and recently vacated. I ended up finding a huge stash of big rounds of nice pine firewood!!! Loaded the hell out of my truck and dumped it as near as I could get to my shack with my truck. Tomorrow, on my day off, ill sweat it into my location.

So somewhere it was decided that I was to be given a helping hand that day.

Note: May have a giant lead to getting my hands on a wood stove! As well as sounds like a guy in my class is gonna try to help me with building a good roof for my shack!!

Minor Success Number One

Last night was the best sleep in my shack I've had yet! (even though I woke at 3am to get to work).

Due to a few factors, the major one embarrasingly being that it was considerably warmer last night (I mean 1 or 2 degrees instead of minus 5), but a couple other factors helped to.

First thing, My blankets that I wrapped around my sleeping bags had been falling off and losing their fasteners that I put into them. I fixed that and improved it. Snugging it around my sleeping bags and tightening it up, leaving no air flow areas open that would destroy my warmth.

The second thing, I ended up trying that theory of heating water and putting it in a bottle and throwing that in with you when you sleep. IT WORKED!

It felt like I was with another body, without the benefits of that in reality, haha. Even though it was a small aluminum bottle, not even 1 litre. It was still noticably warm when I woke up at 3am, 5 hours after I put it in with me.

Im pretty sold on the idea and when I get a bigger bottle, I will definately keep that in with me.

It gave me some confidence that I might be able to slowly build my comfort levels up as the weather gets colder, respectively.

Note: Grated Road!

Just another Note:

and that is that the logging road up to my location was grated with new soil and rock,

Basically means SMOOTHER RIDE!!!!

hopefully I wont have as big a issue with truck maintenance as I thought. And it cuts down on my commute time a bit too!

Failed Attempt Number One,

Couple of nights ago, I may have mentioned, it was SUPER cold. Yesterday I went online and did a weather check and found out that last night was to be the last day in this last little cold front and that it was going to be zero degrees in kelowna which would mean minus three or four where I am. On one side I was happy that it would be only one more really cold night for the next little bit, I was also worried, cause I still wont be able to grab a stove for I dont know how long and Im not getting much sleep.

So Yesterday after work was done (10Am haha im finished), I went to play the last of my hours at the computer gaming store. I feel pretty satiated with Starcraft as Ive gotten into the league that I think I deserve to be in, and now I feel like ive played enough of it for a while and am starting to get back into reading for entertainment.

Buddy said he would call me for some of his homemade beers, and he did, but said that he was pretty smoked from work, which was just fine by me as I kind of wanted to enjoy me night off relaxed by a fire, and that I did.

I built a nice hot fire and kept it hot (Cause it was really cold last night), and while I was fire side, I went over my mind of different temporary options to get a warm nights rest.

A guy had told me once that when your wintercamping boil a couple of liters of water and put it into a 2liter coke bottle and throw that in your sleeping bag. He said that went a long way to getting a warm sleep. I thought of that, but i didnt have much water to spare, or a 2liter pop bottle, AND I dont know if I want a bottle of water in my sleeping bag as I dont think it would be that comfortable.

I also thought of my assets for that night. My biggest asset being a warm fire, even though its outside of my tent. What does a hot fire have at the end of the night? Well, coals and the stones around it are hot too. That let me into the train of thought of sauna's and how they work. Coals and hot rocks right? Well, I didnt want open coals in my tent , but would hot rocks keep me warm?

In theory I thought so, and I ended up putting out quite a bit of effort to make that Idea happen, Unfortunately last night was the coldest night ive slept yet and barely got any sleep considering the huge amount of hours I spent in that bed (9pm-11Am!!). Though the hugely broken up sleep gave way to an amazing amount of vivid dreams.

Unfortunately because there where so many dreams, I dont remember any of them specifically, just bits and pieces. I still liked it though as its almost a psycadelic trip.
So all this said, I am no closer to solving my issues of a warms night sleep, though the weather should give me some mercy for the next couple days at least.

I also have to deal with a big pile of big stones in my tent now, ha.

Wood Stove, the simple life,

Just a note:,

It seems the main thing that I want or need or think about, is my ability to purchase or aquire a wood-stove.

Ive got a wood supply source thats adequate for now.

But if thats all I want in this world, than im doing pretty good.

(Unfortunately, its not all I want, what I want more than anything right now is financial floatation.)

Sorry if the last post had a bit too much violin in it.

Woke up this morning at 2Am, or so, to get to work. And HOLY MOLY its cold.

I found out today that at that time it was about minus 1 or 2 in kelowna which means it must be a few degrees colder on the mountain.

To be honest it worries me a bit, if I cant handle minus 5 than how can i handle minus 30. Then again I dont have a stove or anything else that I want to set up before the full of winter hits.

Also I need to adjust some things with sleeping and that should help a bit. But man, winter is here ready or not!

(Oh and it SMELLS like winter, which I really like!), hopefully i can get some skiing in this winter.

If you think your living on the edge of your seat...

Im so broke it makes me sick,

I had a check for 34 dollars from the government, And all I could think of was how to use it best. When I deposited it into my account I went to immediately withdraw it and found out that my account was now minus 10$, AFTER THE DEPOSIT. It turns out I had a 35$ fee or something in there that I didn't know about.I have a small visa maxed out and nothing else. I threw the last 30 bucks cash I had into my truck for gas, and that was a few days ago... Dont know how low I am now, and if I run out... I dont know what ill do. I didnt go volunteering at the high school today cause I cant afford the gas, and need the free day to figure out my shit.

I sighned up for a visa at Zellers because I need to eat.. I am buying crap food from there and eating at their resturaunt for 28% interest. I tried to withdraw cash from my temporary card but I cant until I have the real one.

I am going to money mart to withdraw 60$. I am withdrawing that 60$ as thats the max I can off of the first (Very small), pay check I got from my new job. To withdraw that small amount of money, its going to cost me just over 50$ straight... So I am paying almost 100 percent interest on that small amount of cash. But I cant think of another option, other than begging... Begging my parents or grand parents, and Ive already done that, and it doesnt make me feel good, and it has to stop some time.

I woke up this morning very cold and slept till 10am trying to get enough un-interrupted sleep. When I went outside the tent, I was threated by ice all over the ground and the outside of the tent.

A wood stove would solve that problem as I can load big stones around the stove that would absorb the heat while the stove ran and then realeased it while I slept. But I dont have 30 cents to spare, so I sleep cold.

Anyways, life gets tight sometimes, and as my granpa used to say to his sons, its not the bills and the tight week or two youll remember when your older, but the big decisions and important degrees or financial investments you didnt get. (I.E. school).

And school is still going good.

Moved In

Moved into the shack this long weekend. Slept three nights there now and I got to say I really like it. By the way, I really shouldnt call it a shack, as its more a glorified wall-tent.

Spent hours and hours beside a hot fire all weekend. Very relaxing and settling.

The tent is buttoned up, as the second night I slept there I almost didn't get any sleep I was so cold.
I found the culprit, and that was the tarp was un-secured and letting air in.
As soon as the breeze starts hitting you, your done.

I also set two extra blankets wrapped around my sleeping bags so now I am sleeping in a four layered taco. Very warm!!

I spent alot of time thinking about it last night and realised that living there doesn't make any financial sense. I am spending more on fuel, entertainment inside town(Starcraft), and food, all together than I would on a 400$ room a month. Not to mention the wear and tear on the truck and the eventual repair bills i would have to pay on it. Also, I would inevitably spend lots of money just to make living there in the winter possible as well.

As soon as I can, I will look for a room, and definately keep the shack as my weekend get-away place, in lue-of money for a cabin and land.

Oh, and for you starcraft players, this weekend I made Platinum League!! Very hard for me to do, I had to destroy many-a expert player to do so!

Other than that, life is fine

Moved in, and a light substance

Last night I moved into the shack.

Finally.!

got all my bedding over and a bunch of other stuff, finished the door with some canvas, tightened up the roof a bit, and built a fire pit a bunch of feet in front of the hut.

I smoked a cigar in utter contentement last night, The next days financial worries not with me and completely forgotten.

I sat in front of a hot fire and contemplated life and girls.

I slept very well and didnt change anything yet compared to my sleeping arrangments in my truck.

** And, though not heavily,

It snowed last night.

The Beginning,

So, as i've never had a blog before, I guess ill just start off as if I have been doing this for a while.

Last night I finally had time to get a huge sleep. About 12 hours actually. The weekend partying in vancouver and then the late drive out here to kelowna, and starting work at 4 in the morning on monday, killed me. The hungarian moonshine (Called Palinka), was drank by me like water on saturday night (For my Moms birthday), and monday and sunday I felt it hard.
Last night was tuesday, and the reason I still not had a good sleep is on monday night, (The night I should have focused on recovering), I stayed in town and played Starcraft II for hours. Then worked again 4 in the morning at the bakery on tuesday, and had school both days... Big mistake

Note to self: NEVER PLAY STARCRAFT WHEN YOU SHOULD GET TO SLEEP EARLY!!

The twelve hour sleep I had was great, but I didnt walk away from it actually getting  full twelve hours. I underestimated the weather, and went to sleep with not much warm clothing and tossed and turned from the cold quite a bit. But all in all I got enough sleep to recover.

This morning was the coldest ive been in yet. Surprising cold. Was difficult to get changed in my truck before my balls froze off (Sorry for that rough language, but was the absolute truth). Maybe a small taste of things to come this winter.

My doubled up sleeping bag set-up wasn't warm enough. Even though one of them is rated for minus 17 degrees celcius. Though to be fair to it, its pretty warn out, and has been washed one too many times.

It looks like my plan for the winter is setting up a multi layered sleeping cover system. With A very large, heavy duty wool blanket wrapped around a smaller down blanket wrapped around my double sleeping bag wrap. The large blankets will be fastened on the sides to the ply-wood sheet that is my bed frame, so as not to shift. Hopefully the wood stove can keep the shack warmish for most of the night too.

Im looking foward to finally moving into the shack..

Its a long drive up the mountain just to park my truck. Even if the location is awsome.

Not much to do to move in really, but there is always something better to do in town, (Starcraft II), and without the wood stove yet, the motivation to get in there isn't quite enough yet. Though a soon as I get free night ill probably do it.

At school, we are working in the wood shop now, and have huge wood waste bins all over the place. I asked one of the authority figures if I can get access to the garbage wood, and he said for sure, no problem. SWEET!!! heating supply for the winter, DONE.

One of the guys from the classroom advised against using the wood-waste because something from processed wood gums up wood stoves and fire-places. But what he doesn't know is , I dont give a shit...

Oh well, advice taken and stored in my brain. Maybe sometime when I own a nice wood stove, ill try not to use wood-shop waste.

Today was the first day in the shop for school, instead of sitting in the same chair in a classroom for eight hours. And man did the time fly. Sometime during midday I looked up from my work and noticed only a few guys left and the teacher, so I asked where everyone was, and the teacher told me they went for lunch break 20minutes ago, haha. Oops, having too much fun with a wood planer.

Hope this was a good first blog!,

now off to Starcraft...

First Post!

This is my first post!

Hope I can figure this site out.